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Health & Fitness

Volunteering in the School Community

Volunteers are needed for PTO events, in the classroom, field trips. The list is never-ending. Have you considered the message you're sending your child by your (lack of) involvement?

In 1906 Italian economist Vilfredo Pareto observed that it seemed to him that just 20 percent of the population held 80 percent of the nation's wealth. And after having just begun my 7th year at my children's elementary school, I am pretty certain that the same can be said about the school's volunteers.

Time and time again, it is the same moms, dads, or grandparents who sign up to fill the PTO chair positions and classroom needs.

Part of the grief process for me last May as my son was graduating 5th grade was that I knew we were going to lose a key group of dedicated moms (and grandmas) who were leaving the school, too. While I was pushing my oldest child out of the 'elementary nest', many of my friends were celebrating their youngest child's graduation into middle school.

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Honestly, I feared that with the loss of those parents, expertise and knowledge was leaving too. Our school has an extremely active PTO, with several concurrent activities all year long. Experience is what makes us a cohesive group.

A wise mom, whose son graduated with my son Adam last May, gave me some sage advice many years ago. After witnessing my 'volunteer frenzy' our boys' kindergarten year, she said to pace myself. I had plenty of time to be involved. And I did not want to burn out too early.

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Great advice considering I will have been at our school for eleven consecutive years by the time my youngest moves into middle school. As of today, I am barely half way through MY elementary experience.

Fortunately, when my daughter began kindergarten last year, a new crop of parents appeared, too. To our delight as a PTO Board, there are several who are enthusiastic, bold, and involved. It makes this parental transition easier. I am encouraged by each new name I see signed up for upcoming school events.

What is ironic is that now I am considered one of the 'leaders' and I'm not sure how I feel about it. Certainly, I've been around the block...er...school for awhile; I guess my status was upgraded when I stayed behind with my first grade daughter and the more experienced mom's handed me the torch as they moved to middle school.

The fact is that it would be helpful if more parents signed up to co-chair and assist at events--taking the pressure off us 'old timers'. I am already feeling a bit burned out by all the different areas I've volunteered. And I have plenty of years ahead of me.

Sadly, over the years, there have been plenty of parents who I have never seen at any event in any sort of volunteer capacity. For that matter, some parents never even felt it important enough to attend open houses, parent/teacher conferences, or even one class party.

The bottom line for me is that being visible in the school keeps me connected to my children while they are away from me for the largest part of their waking hours. I get to know the teachers and administration, other parents, even develop relationships with attention-starved kids that are in the same class with one of my kids.

At times it is exhausting and, at times, I know that I am over-committed. But I also know that my kids know that I am investing in them and their childhoods. I am providing them a security that despite their long days away from home, I am staying connected in what's going on in their world. While I trust the teachers and administrators to play the key role in educating my children, I also understand the role is a continuing partnership between teacher-child-parent. We all need each other.

The next time you pass those dreaded sign up sheets, will you think to yourself "Oh, someone else will do it". Or will you be that someone?

Working parents, stay-at-home parents alike--we are all busy. But we all made the conscience decision to have children. Isn't this a part of the role as a parent? Ask yourself, what message are you sending your child?

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